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‘Game of Thrones’ recap: Coldhands

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Margaery stands before the people of King's Landing. (Macall B. Polay/courtesy of HBO)

Margaery stands before the people of King’s Landing, and surprisingly does not have to do her own walk of shame. (Macall B. Polay/courtesy of HBO)

“Game of Thrones” fans were still recovering from the deep wound left by last week’s episode (I will never hear ‘hold the door’ without being heartbroken again), only to have to endure not being able to watch Jon Snow this week. Will this show ever give its fans a break? Thankfully, another brooding Stark emerged, as Benjen Stark (Ned’s younger brother who has not been seen since the first episode) came to the rescue and helped out Meera and Bran, who were alone and about to be killed beyond the wall.

Benjen’s five-season long absence was explained, as he was stabbed by a White Walker and left to die in season one. He was saved by The Children, and led to the Three-Eyed Raven to wait for and assist Bran — confirming the fan theory that Benjen is Coldhands, a character from the book series the television show is based off of who aids Bran while he is North of the Wall.

The Stark reunions this season have been precious, and the reemergence of Benjen Stark was exciting, but unfortunately this episode also brought back Walder Frey and his millions of children and wives, who haven’t been seen since the disastrous Red Wedding in season three. The essentially weak family lost their hold on Riverrun, the castle that was originally home to the Tully family (Catelyn Stark’s family) to Brynden “the Blackfish” Tully, a noted warrior who has enough supplies to survive a siege at Riverrun for over a year. Despite that knowledge, the deranged Walder Frey orders a siege anyways.

Somehow Walder Frey didn’t make the stupidest move in this episode. That award goes to King Tommen Baratheon. In an attempt to save his wife Margaery from doing her walk of atonement, where she is stripped, has her hair cut off and is forced to walk naked through the city of King’s Landing while a sadistic woman “shames” her, Tommen made an alliance with the Sparrows — who somehow manage to scare me more than Ramsay Bolton does. Ramsay literally fed a one-day-old baby to a pack of dogs after murdering his own father, and gets enjoyment out of skinning people, yet this weird cult that is taking over King’s Landing is more frightening.

Maybe it’s because they currently have the upper hand on not only Cersei, but also Olenna Tyrell — which is incredibly rare for “Game of Thrones.” I’d say maybe Tommen has something secretive planned to get back at the Sparrows, but anyone who watches the show knows that he’s too weak and pathetic to actually do anything.

Marry

Tommen and Margaery’s marriage is disgustingly stronger than ever through their new alliance.

Screw

Now that the Lannisters have worked their way up into one of my favorite families on the show, I can’t wait to watch whoever is screwed and ends up fighting the Mountain during Cersei’s trial. The guy was terrifying in life, and way scarier now that he’s undead.

Kill

Surprisingly not a lot of people — only the Wights who attacked Meera and Bran were killed by Benjen. I feel like that means there’s going to be a massive amount of deaths in upcoming episodes, though. “Blood of my Blood” was the calm before the storm.

Prediction

Jaime is going to have to be a Kingslayer again, as he’ll eventually have to either kill or order his son Tommen to be killed before he completely destroys King’s Landing.

Stray Observation

Arya laughing at Joffrey’s death in the play she watched was great. Imagine her joy if she had actually been there.

 

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‘Game of Thrones’ recap: Coldhands