‘Game of Thrones’ recap: Where my dogs at?

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(Helen Sloan / HBO)

Brother Ray saves The Hound and adopts him into a pacifist society, before being brutally slain by the Brotherhood Without Banners. (Helen Sloan / HBO)

I’m pretty sure all “Game of Thrones” fans were on the same page when they assumed HBO accidentally started playing a random movie instead of last night’s episode, “The Broken Man.” The scene was of an idyllic village, where people worked together happily — sounds like nothing out of the HBO show. But then we were greeted with a familiar face and I rejoiced because The Hound is alive and thriving on “hate” — aren’t we all.

In the two seasons since we’ve seen the beloved character, he’s joined with a cult-like pacifist society, who seem to be the only happy and peaceful people in all of Westeros. Of course, it’s “Game of Thrones” so they couldn’t survive more than an episode. While The Hound was chopping wood, every member of the group he was living with was murdered by the Brotherhood Without Banners — a religious group in the Riverlands. Now they have The Hound on their tail.

If it wasn’t for Margaery Tyrell’s perfect playing of the game of thrones, her family would also end up like the group The Hound was living with. I have no idea what Margaery has planned, but she’s certainly not as pious as she has the High Sparrow thinking she is, which is evident through her drawing she passed to Olenna as she urged her to leave King’s Landing and go home to Highgarden — a rose, the symbol of their house.

Jon, Sansa and Davos are having a difficult time getting the Northern houses to rally to the Stark side against the Boltons, except with Lady Mormont (Jorah’s cousin) of Bear Island. The 10-year-old leader of a house was unlike any other child on the show. She told off Jon Snow, mocked Sansa and was the sassiest character the show has seen yet. I know we all can’t wait to see Daenerys take the throne, but can Lady Lyanna Mormont be her VP or something? She reluctantly gave 62 men to Jon and Sansa’s cause, and helped to prepare them for battle herself. Let me remind you, she’s 10. When I was 10, I think I was just finding out how to hold a fork for myself, let alone prepare an army for battle. Davos understandably appreciated her sass, and told her that if her soldiers were half as ferocious as she, “the Boltons are doomed.”

The biggest drama of the night was with Arya, though. After rejecting her duty from the House of Black and White in last week’s episode, the Waif has been sent to kill Arya, and nearly does in this week’s episode. She’s stabbed repeatedly, and gets away by jumping in a river, only to emerge from the river bleeding profusely. She can’t die, though. She just can’t. There’s no way we’d have to sit through seasons of trying to decipher literally anything Jaqen H’ghar said just to have Arya die. That would be awful storytelling. Thankfully, Theon and Yara are in Essos, and Gendry must have been able to row there in his three seasons of rowing a boat somewhere. She’s got to find help, eventually.

Screw

I would say the Brotherhood Without Banners is screwed with an armed The Hound following after them, but book readers know that they’re led by a pretty vicious woman who can’t really be killed. If they change the leader for the show, then they could potentially be done for.

Marry

After what Sansa endured with Ramsay, I forgot that she was ever married to Tyrion until everyone’s new favorite character, Lady Mormont, reminded her that she’s no longer a Stark, but a Lannister and a Bolton.

Kill

Everyone in the pacifist society the Hound was living in. You really never can be at peace in Westeros.

Stray observation

Arya desperately needed help in this episode, and right when she was at her most vulnerable the scene changed to The Hound. Is this a sign? Will everyone’s favorite duo reunite?

Prediction

This season is big on bringing people back from wherever they’ve been for the past few seasons, and tying up loose ends, so my prediction is that Arya is going to run into Gendry while hiding from the Waif, who will protect her with his massive biceps he now has after rowing across an ocean (that had to be the case after he’s been rowing for three seasons now), and they’ll sail back to Westeros together.