When someone follows you around, monitors your every move or invades your privacy, that’s not love — it’s control. With Valentine’s Day coming up, I want to focus on the bad parts of “love,” especially in women’s sports. 

On Jan. 13, news broke that 55-year-old Michael Lewis was allegedly stalking 2024 WNBA Rookie of the Year Caitlin Clark. He was charged with a level five felony because he sent threats and sexually violent texts via social media, according to court documents.

In December of 2024, 40-year-old Robert Cole Parmalee pleaded guilty to stalking UConn women’s basketball senior Paige Bueckers. Katie Barnes of ESPN said Parmalee “is barred from arenas, hotels and practice facilities where the UConn women’s basketball team is present. The state’s attorney also added that the WNBA has barred him from all arenas and practice facilities.” 

While some cases like these are brought to light and the perpetrator is usually questioned, sometimes cases come out far too late — or not at all. 

For example, Rebecca Cheptegei, a Ugandan runner who participated in the 2024 Paris Olympics, was burned alive by her ex-boyfriend last September. 

Cheptegei made many reports to the police about her ex-boyfriend. One time when she called the police, Cheptegei’s father Joseph said that the officer “was tired of all the complaints at this homestead, and he didn’t want to hear any more of their domestic argument.”

Another example of higher authorities not taking a situation like this seriously is when Larry Nassar — previously the doctor for the United States women’s national gymnastics team — was first reported in 2015 for allegedly sexually harassing gymnasts. He continued working for more than a year before he pleaded guilty in 2017.

In 2022, Olympic gymnasts like Simone Biles, Aly Raisman and McKayla Maroney sued the FBI for $1 billion because they did not stop Nassar from working. More than 150 women came forward about Nassar abusing them.

Spanish footballer Jenni Hermoso was allegedly forcibly kissed by Spain’s former football chief Luis Rubiales. His trial — where he is accused of sexual assault and coercion — began on Feb. 6 in Madrid, where her teammates Irene Paredes, Laia Codina and Alexia Putellas have appeared in court.

Clark and Bueckers didn’t know their harassers personally, but Cheptegei, Biles, Raisman, Maroney and Hermoso did. You truly never know what can happen to you; you can have the utmost faith in someone, but they can end up becoming your worst enemy.

This topic is important to me because women’s sports are becoming more and more popular these days, especially with the rise of the WNBA. That’s great, but there are downsides, whether we like it or not. 

While this is a sports-focused article, these experiences aren’t limited to sports. Forbes reported that in 2024, 82% of women in the U.S. had experienced harassment or assault in their lives. 

Women these days are always cautious when they go out, go on dates and even in day-to-day life. Almost every woman I know carries some sort of self-defense weapon: things like pepper spray, alarm keychains, knives and so much more. 

Many women don’t share that things like this are happening and/or have happened to them because they’re scared people won’t believe them. Many people are quick to believe that when a woman comes out with something as serious as this, it’s fake. Our own president has had allegations of sexual misconduct and he claims they’re fake, even when 18 separate women have come out to testify.

The above examples show that many women deal with this, even celebrities. It’s a sad and scary world out there, but bringing awareness to stories like these is so important. Perhaps it will lead to women feeling more comfortable sharing their experiences.

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• Olympic runner Rebecca Cheptegei’s death shines a light on domestic violence
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