The cocktail was lukewarm, but the conversation was cold. For Priya Shah, a DePaul graduate student, the realization hit halfway through an appetizer that her date wasn’t just boring; he’d spent the last twenty minutes explaining the “true geniusness” of his own LinkedIn profile.

“I realized I couldn’t sit through an entrée,” Shah said. “I didn’t want to be mean, but I also didn’t want to waste another hour of my life pretending to be interested in SEO optimization.”

Her experience is far from unique. As dating culture shifts toward a “high-volume, low-stakes” model driven by dating apps, the bad date has become an inevitable rite of passage. But with that rise comes a new social necessity: the preplanned escape route.

The “Plan B” Playbook

When a date goes south, most people aren’t just looking for the check; they’re looking for a graceful exit. According to Monika Garcia, a local bartender at The Bar on Buena, who has witnessed hundreds of first encounters from behind the wood, the escape has become a choreographed art form.

“You can always tell when the Plan B is being activated,” Garcia said. “There’s the sudden, frantic checking of the phone, followed by a very specific type of wide-eyed look toward their friend at the other end of the bar.”

So what are the most popular tactics for leaving a date unscathed?

The SOS Speed Dial: Shah and Garcia admitted to having a designated emergency contact. This friend is tasked with calling at a specific time to provide a fake crisis involving a locked-out roommate or a sudden pet illness. Garcia said, “As a bartender, I have seen people even use their pet snake’s constipation to get out of a lousy date.”

The “Angel Shot” Protocol: Many bars like The Bar on Buena have implemented discreet safety measures. If a patron asks for an angel shot, it signals to the staff that they feel unsafe or need help getting to their car without their date following. There are many TikTok videos highlighting the angel shot trend which has helped spread awareness of this tactic. 

The Early Bird Boundary: A growing trend among students is setting a hard end time before the date even begins. 

“I always say I have a 9 p.m. study group or a deadline,” Shah said. “If the date is good, the deadline magically disappears. If it’s bad, I have a built-in exit.”

The Chaos: Zoe Eitel, the assistant director of operations & outreach at DePaul’s Career Center, says she enjoys plans which have chaos written all over them. She suggested, “Get your friend to the restaurant and make them sit in a different place. If the date goes south, make them ‘accidentally’ spill wine or food on your date. Take the first exit.”

To Ghost or to be Ghosted?

The ultimate dilemma remains: do you tell them it’s not working, or do you let them down gently with a white lie?

For many, the slow fade or the urgent emergency is preferred over immediate confrontation. “In a public space, you don’t always know how a stranger will react to rejection,” Garcia noted.

However, Eitel argues that she enjoys being quirky and keeping it simple but chaotic. “If things just start getting weird, make it worse and just start barking.” Now that’s golden advice! 

However, Shah argued that a soft truth is becoming more common. “I’ve started saying, ‘I’m not really feeling a spark, so I think I’m going to head out.’ It’s awkward for ten seconds, but it saves everyone a week of confusing text messages later.”

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