DeJamz – Songs that make white people go crazy 

By Lilly Keller, Arts and Life editor 

POV: It’s the Fourth of July and glorious, most definitely unregulated fireworks color the inky darkness with thunderous applause. Each explosion is almost deafening, but beneath it all, you can still make out the distinct music of your ancestors as Neil Diamond’s velvety voice unites the country with two triumphant words. 

“Sweet Caroline” – Neil Diamond

This song goes particularly well with baseball, arguably the second thing that makes white people tick for some reason. I don’t know who Caroline is, and honestly, I don’t care. There are few things in my life I have put as much effort into as screaming the “bah bah bah” bit. I hope this song never fades away because it is the highlight of my Fourth of July and broadcast Yankee game. 

“American Pie” – Don McLean

I don’t remember ever listening to this song enough to know all the lyrics, yet if somebody held me at gunpoint and told me to sing this song without messing up, tell my roommates that I’ll be home for dinner. This song is unironically incredible, and actually how I found out about how Buddy Holly died. Anyways, if Buddy Holly’s death was the sacrifice needed to make this masterpiece, I’m glad the chess pieces arranged themselves the way they did, if you know what I mean. 

“Y.M.C.A.” – Village People 

Oh yeah, I went there. Talk about a song meant for white people. It’s even got its own unique dance! Bonus points because this song turns a Christian organization into a place you can hang out with the boys if you are picking up what I’m putting down. Anyhow, the day I can no longer perform the silly arm motions is when I will no longer be on this earth. 

“Mr. Brightside” – The Killers 

Again, another song I don’t recall ever listening to in my free time, yet I know all the lyrics by heart. Honestly, I feel like we don’t appreciate the lyrics enough in this song. I mean, “turning saints into the sea, swimming through sick lullabies choking on your alibi” goes incredibly hard. When this song comes on, you know you’re about to be slammed into by sweaty jumping white people and you know what? You don’t care because it’s “Mr. Brightside” by the Killers!

“Come on Eileen” – Dexy Midnight Runners

A personal favorite of mind, “Come on, Eileen” will never be skipped on my playlists. Composed of the banjo, accordion and fiddle, there are a few songs whose craftsmanship holds up as well as in the ‘80s in 2022. I’m jealous if you are named Eileen because I’ll never be as iconic as you. 

Connect with Lilly Keller: @lillyraek | [email protected]