Hello, my lovely DeJamz reader. I have reached that point in the academic quarter where I am so beyond stressed that I no longer feel human emotion. I have simply stared into the void of D2L for too long and it has unfortunately begun staring back. Since my mental state is now a swirling mess of exhaustion and midterm due dates, I’ve found that my Spotify reflects that inner turmoil. Basically, I’ve just been listening to the songs I know will make me cry in the hopes that it’ll reassure me that I can still feel something. There’s no better way to celebrate hitting submit on that shitty midterm paper than listening to songs that only make you feel worse!

I wish I knew what in my subconscious this song linked onto to become a source of emotional catharsis. While I can psychoanalyze that statement later, you can experience it right now! I have a visceral memory from freshman year of college of weeping and laying in the grass on the Quad in the middle of the night and playing this song on repeat. Perhaps not the most joyous of memories, but it's a great song nonetheless.

This wouldn’t be a Claire Tweedie approved DeJamz without including at least one country or folk song. Old 97s is easily one of my favorite bands, and I heavily associate their music with my childhood. This song, in particular though, has such melancholic lyrics that if I listen to it too closely, I do start to slowly break down. Read the lyrics for yourself, and try to tell me it isn’t a beautifully poetic story of war and death.

You know how everyone inevitably cries on their birthday? If your instinct reaction to that statement was, ‘No, what the hell are you talking about?’ then I think we’re just fundamentally different people. “30/90” is the quintessential song to wallow in your birthday depression. The upbeat rock instrumentals help drown out the sounds of your sobbing and Andrew Garfield’s vocals (and performance in that movie) will eventually put a smile on your face.

Sometimes, even the most wholesome of songs can bring a tear or two to your eye. For whatever reason, I have a very vivid memory of my mom driving me and my brother to elementary school and singing along to this song in the car. Ah, such simpler times. Now, I associate this song with homesickness and missing my mom. Isn’t it funky how personal meanings behind songs can vary so wildly? Human consciousness is crazy!

Let’s end this playlist on a slightly more whimsical note. My adoration for The Muppets should be no surprise if you’ve read my previous DeJamz. That being said, “Rainbow Connection” holds a special place in my heart. There’s nothing quite like listening to a green, fabric frog sing about the uncertainty of life and the wish for happiness that makes me sob. You’re right Kermit; maybe someday I will find it, the rainbow connection. The lovers, the dreamers and me.